PARENTING is gromming a life during your life
Parenting is not a course that you will find in books and just read those books and you are graduate or master , it's a process in which you are in new situations and you can tackle it by listening and understanding experience of your elders.
Parenting is a journey ,a life time course in which every person has his own experience
The journey starts once a married couple plan to have a baby .The pregnant woman has a difficult phase during 9 months .Our elders tell us and even we have seen in Mahabharata how Abhimanyu listens ,while he was in his mothers womb , how to enter chakra view when his parents were talking about it but as his mom slept so could not hear how to come out .Whatever mother feels and the way she reacts with others the baby gets those vibes in womb and develops same vibes in himself .Its always good for pregnant mother to listen to positive quotes and stories and remain positive .
Once the baby is delivered a new journey begins ,in this the whole family must be involved as every one has contribution to make .The more child is with different people more different vibes he feels and child starts growing mentally .
This has deep impact on psychology of child .The more people talk more response the child gives and starts opening up and sharing .Every parent must make sure that the way they behave child is observing and understanding all the gestures Same qualities child imbibes. Qualities are not like medicine that you give a course or give vaccine and those qualities will be in his body ,they have to be inculcated Whatever quality you want in your child the parent must project same in front of him.
The child will not pick what you preach but will observe how you interact and react in a situation.
Every phase in child's life parents have to play different role - till the age of 4years parents have to guide him how to behave and show him same through their ways of dealing and reacting but in polite way .Till now child is at home he feels safe but once he is admitted in school a new phase starts Now parent need to give time to child to understand his mind set and help him adjust in new environment.
Spend time with him and help him do his school work and also ask about his class teacher and friends and about school Now is phase parent need to ask him questions to make him share himself so that any problem he faces he feels free to share.
Visit school regularly and keep in touch with his class teacher Help him in his home task but give him freedom to share his views If you doing household work involve him and slowly give him responsibility to do some easy jobs at home like watering plants ,folding clothes etc
As he grows up share more responsibility but always remember never scold your child or compare your child with others .Every child is unique in himself Lend your ears to his talks do not ignore him because if you ignore him he will lose confidence and stop sharing himself
When he grows to age of 11-12 he starts developing physical changes now the parent has to start becoming his guide and friend and share with him their own experiences so that child easily accepts those changes Now pressure of study also increases ,parent need to listen to child's psychological queries and help him solve them .At this stage do not snub or scold your child but try to understand his point of view and the problem he facing Once child reaches age 14 again changes occur in his life as now adolescence period begins and he starts understanding peer pressure ,at this stage parent has to reply to his what , why and how related anything and everything. Do not snub him but reply as per his age because half knowledge or knowledge from other source might be dangerous.
The phase of child from class9-12 is a phase where child has his own expectations ,peer pressure and expectation of parents which some times makes the child lose his confidence in himself .In this phase parents must spend more time understanding caliber of child and his dreams about future ,this all will happen through discussion Do not impose your will on child as it may result in shattering child's confidence for lifetime Let him choose his field of interest but do guide him the pro and cons of that field by talking to career counsellors so that child understand it with depth the career option he selecting.
Once child has cleared class 12 we feel the child has grown he can take decisions on his own of life but it's wrong Now parents need to guide the child about society how to interact and react as he is out from protected environment of school to a world which is very cruel
Parent has to become his friend and give him guidance when ever he requires but keep close watch on his activities by daily interaction so that he does not get involved in some wrong habits As he grows to be an adult now parents have to involve him in family decisions and discussions.
In short in every phase of life parents must preach and practice same thing ,never scold your child or hit him physically ,never compare your child with others - as all these will make your child lose confidence in himself Last point child is of both mother and father so both have to share responsibility of grooming him.
Now a days there are nuclear families both parents are working and both have high ambitions at professional level ,in that race to be on the top professionally they ignore their child's requirements and rely on their helpers to fulfil their child's needs .They substitute their presence by expensive presents but they must not forget if today they forget or ignore their child then in future they will be ignored by the child.
Blessed are those who become parents so please nurture and groom the gift of God to your best potential and enjoy each phase of their been groomed .
Ms Sanjana Bakshi Datta
Principal
DAV Public School
RK Puram
Delhi
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